I can hear him not wanting to die with fiberoptic
clarity. The gun in his lap has other
thoughts but won't get on the phone. This

is what the manual describes as a crisis.
I make a note to beat the people who wrote
the manual. I tell this to the man

on the phone and ask him to tell the gun
so we can all laugh. The manual doesn't
go in for laughter. The manual says I'm never